11:00pm

Saturday night everyone was out of the house, except for Jerrica and I.  All of the kids were busy with friends and nights out.  Stephen was even gone!  Jerrica and I watched a movie with popcorn and did each other’s hair.  After a while she started doing her doll’s hair and I started texting different friends.

One friend was reading a book and told me a little about it and the author.  It happened to be the same book that I skipped last month for bookclub.  I then diverted my attention to this author on the internet and her battle with cancer.  She is dying and has four cute little kids.  The end is near for her.  What surprised me was that she was not bitter, but instead grateful.  Grateful for each day.  Grateful for the outpouring of love towards her.  Even grateful for cancer!  She wrote, “Cancer was this gift that exposed to us what is important and what’s valuable”

How can she say that cancer is a gift!?!?!

Yet you could see in the eyes of her children the love.  You could read in her words the love.  Love that might not necessarily be there had not the cancer quickened their living.  She really made me look at how I appreciate each day and how I use my time to show love to my children and Stephen.  I take “time” for granted.

One by one each of my kids and Stephen came home.  Yet, it was different because I stopped what I was doing and hung on every word that they described to me about their evening.  I could see the connection in their eyes as they explained their activities with friends.  I actually saw their eyes because I stopped what I was doing to give them full attention.  I couldn’t possibly multitask after what I had read.

Then everyone headed to bed.  Nathan asked to stay up to play XBox for a bit.  Stephen crashed as soon as he hit the pillow.  I laid there in bed and couldn’t resist the urge to go up to the loft and watch Nathan play his game.  I pulled out the other gamer chair and started talking.  He looked at me like I was crazy, even asked me a hundred times why I was up there watching him play.

It was fun!  We laughed about the names of the other Live players playing on XBox Live.  We joked about who the people were that were up playing this game.  We scrutinized the ridiculous graphics in the game.  After a while he eventually told me I was good luck and should come up more often to watch him play.  Nathan has a funny personality and I couldn’t help laugh out loud quite a few times. 

When I finally went to bed I smiled to myself.  I was there!  I was doing something without multi-tasking or for some specific purpose.  I was there!  I could feel that Nathan knew I loved him, and oh how I do love that boy!

This year is going to be different.  I feel it with the goals I have set.  SO excited for the fresh start!  I’m already planning for the next late night with Nathan … buy his favorite treats and stash somewhere until we have our next little late night party.

Sleep is over-rated when there are memories to be made!